Ascender:
http://www.lacrossetribune.com/news/local/article_9ee5d1bc-cdbc-11de-a418-001cc4c002e0.html
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: Mark Brye, who owns Brye Plumbing in Viroqua, was still laughing about the suicidal buck he found near his elk statue last week
Ascender: "lawn ornament fight-lost". I've had nights like that.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: you have witnessed something like this? or you have losts to a lawn ornament?
Ascender: Let's put it his way, never jump over a fence without checking for gnomes.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: sneaky little fellows jump outta nowhere!
BIGDAN89:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnC95hU7G_M&feature=fvhl should be at 60 lol
Ascender: No, no, no. What happens is that suddenly, a lawn gnome has been standing there for years.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: lol and then what happens?
Ascender: Fence. Lawn gnome. Jumping.
Ascender: You know, lawn gnomes. Pointy little red hats?
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: lol yes i def know what a lawn gnome is. the real question is, ...can you suddenly be standing there for years? is that possible??
🙂
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: so it sounds like you def lost to the lawn gnome?
Ascender: I dunno, he wasn't there when I went over the top ofthe fence, but when I landed on him, he had already been there for years.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: LOL. longest jump EVER!
Ascender: It's a lawn gnome. They're evil. I think they have time travel.
Ascender: Tell me you've never been walking in a garden with nobody around, andturned to find one of those creepy little buggers staring at you.
Ascender: And I guarantee you, you had just looked at exactly the same spot, no gnome, and when you turned back, he'd been there for years.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: ive never been walking in a garden with nobody around and turned to find one of those creepy little buggers staring at me.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: lmao....but i also don't know many people who use the word Bugger besides me
Ascender: It's not a sudden appearanceof a new gnome. When they appear, it is very obvious that they have both been there for a long, lont time, and yet only appeared the instant before.
Ascender: Have you read the Hitchhikers Guide series?
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: nope but i have heard of that series.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: worth reading?
Ascender: You should read it. Then everything i jsut said will make sense.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: the whole series or a particular book?
Ascender: The whole thing, but start with the first one, otherwise you'll only be more confused.
BIGDAN89: gnomes sre great pratice targets lol
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: normally i only read even numbered books, but ill trust ya on this one and give it a go starting with number one
Ascender: I don't mess with em Dan. Too creepy. I'm not gonna antagonize em.
BIGDAN89: but i have not seen gnome in years lol
Ascender: Three of them have my neighbor.
BIGDAN89: lol ill go kick them over
Ascender: It's like a cat thing. You don't have lawn gnomes, they have you.
BIGDAN89: then do some other tings
Ascender: I'll watch for you missing persons report, Dan. I'mtelling you, don't mess with the lawn gnomes.
BIGDAN89: lol
BIGDAN89: ?
Ascender: They're patient. I mean, look how long they're willing to wait for one stupid fish.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: lol are you from WI or do you just really enjoy news stories about lawn ornaments?
Ascender: I found that on a local racing forum, and it tickled me.
Ascender: You wanna talk about a splitting headache.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: you have one or the gnomes give you one?
Ascender: The deer. I meant the deer.
Ascender: The gnome was a totally unrelated body part.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: lol. oh dear.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: so what scares a gnome?
Ascender: No, oh gnome.
Ascender: Dunno. Moss?
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: moss? oh gnome, i don't imagine that would.
Ascender: You sit in the same spot for thrity years and tell me whether you develop a fear of moss.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: you make a decent point.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: almost as pointy as a gnomes hat
Ascender: Not even close, trust me.
Ascender: Why do you think that all lawn gnomes wear red hats?
BIGDAN89: this whole convo seems to be Bad acid trup lol
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: blood?
Ascender: I think the little creeps just sit there waiting for some unlucky schmoe to impale himself and die, then they digest him like a pitcher plant, but from the inside.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: lol and lol at dan too.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: i better not have nightmares about gnomes tonight...
BIGDAN89: wth
BIGDAN89: you are flipping werid gnomes come on now little plastic figures that do nothing
Ascender: heeheehee...
Ascender: OK, I can't keep it up anymore. I'm laughing so hard I'm dribbling on my keyboard...
BIGDAN89: ?
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: insanity
Ascender: There's only so long i can keep up that level of surreality before I lose it altogether. I've been laughing like a lunatic for the past ten minutes. Now my nose is all stuffed up, and I'm sniffling like crazy to keep from dripping on my laptop.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: kleenex?
Ascender: Napkins. I got it.
Ascender: I think i hadDan seriously wondering about my sanity.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: gnome doubt about it.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: darn do you realize I'm going to be saying gnome this and gnome that for the entire day tomorrow? even though nobody will have the slightest idea what i am talking about.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: at least ill get a good chuckle
Ascender: Why wait till tomorrow? Gnome time like the present.
Ascender: Hey what do you call a suburbanite gnome with a great sense of rhythm?
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: wow i have gnome idea
Ascender: A metro-gnome.
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: LMAO. wow. gnome joke...that was good
BIGDAN89: acend u got me thinking if i was on something or idk lol
Mrs.Fluxurcouch: like you have gnome idea if you are the crazy one or everyone is?
Ascender: Ok, I just laughed so hard I got eye-floaters.
